My Dear Masonic family:
Who is your biggest critic, when it comes to your mistakes? If you're like me, it's yourself. Why is it that often our friends, loved ones, and even strangers are willing to forgive us our errors with love and compassion, yet we do not give ourselves the same benefit?
I was reflecting upon my own metaphorical self-flagellation recently, when I was comforted by some of the symbols of Masonry.
I've discussed the ashlars before, I believe, and yet, they seem to re-appear to my conscience often. We are all born rough and unfinished and we have an entire life time to work on honing and perfecting ourselves. And the process of striving for perfection is just that: a process. It takes time. It takes work. It takes mistakes and recoveries. Else it would not be worth striving for. Each new rough and superfluous piece of me is one more to discover, analyze, and then clip off on the path to perfection.
Even more meaningfully, I re-discovered the checkered pavement. I've always been fond of the symbolism of the black and white checkers. Perhaps that's what draws me to chess and the yin-yang symbol. However, it's easy to think about a symbol very conceptually and forget to add it to your life. In my mind I had stuffed it to the recesses with a nonchalant "yeah, yeah, good, evil, whatever." However, it is so much powerful when actually applied. The checkered pavement is there to remind us that all people walk across it. All people have good moments and bad moments. All people, no matter how good, sometimes make mistakes, or even act intentionally evil. Yet this does not make us "good" or "evil" people. It makes us human. And, it is the awareness of this which allows us to pick ourselves up and journey forward, with new resolutions, and more experience. Anyone who styles themselves completely good or completely evil is either not human, or is fooling himself. And, were they actually correct, I feel sad at how alone and seperate they would be from the rest of humanity.
Suddenly, it is a natural process to screw up. It is expected. At least by the wise people who described our symbols to us. And, if by them, why not us?
I feel relieved, knowing that my mistakes fit into an anticipated design, rather than point me out as an aberration of nature. I feel relieved to know that others are prepared to forgive and accept me, as I gladly do for them during their weakest times. And, at last, with these peaceful thoughts, I find that I have already forgiven myself, and I am already eagerly anticipating my next challenge.
Fraternally,
David Sylvester
Senior Warden