I had a lesson in leadership recently. I had to make a tough decision at Lodge this month. And, I knew that, whichever choice I made, I was going to disappoint a friend and brother. For only one of them would be able to have what he wanted. For me, it felt like I was in a nowin situation.

It caused me to remember the words of a Vice President who managed me when I first got into corporate management so many years ago. He would call all the managers together and teach us leadership philosophies, and motivational ideas for improving ourselves. Most of the managers grumbled and complained that he never taught us anything “practical” or gave them sales tips. In fact, he rarely even cared about the numbers. Yet, he always had a management parable, or a cute diagram to draw on the whiteboard regarding how our principles define our actions. Sometimes, it seemed he didn’t care about us at all, because his topics seemed so far from the day-to-day operations of the company. The words I so distinctly remember him saying were, “They don’t pay me to be your friend. They pay me to be your leader.”

Back then, I didn’t understand. I was young and naïve. Once I got a little older, started taking more leadership courses, and started better understanding the relationship between symbols and the world, thoughts and actions, attitude and behaviours, his parables and diagrams began to make sense. Once I held my first executive position, I began to understand his seeming lack of caring for details. Only recently, though, have I come to understand his seeming lack of caring for the people he governed. It wasn’t that he didn’t care. I see now that he cared deeply for all of us. However, it’s not a leader’s job to care, it’s a leader’s job to lead. It’s far more important for a leader to make decisions for the good of the whole organization than it is to appease every member’s wish and whim.

Many past masters have coached me on preparing myself to see that I can’t please everyone every time. I think I see now just how necessary this preparation is. Being a leader can be extremely stressful if every decision is taken personally, causing distress every time another person’s feelings are hurt by decisions that must be made.

I am also starting to see why there is such a lack of leadership in the world, and why quality leaders are so respected, well-paid, and sought after.

It’s comforting to know that Masonry is one of the few places that looks to teach people these lessons, so that Masons can be leaders in life, just as they have been in Lodge.

Fraternally,

David Sylvester
Master

slyman007@aol.com